The Carnelian Fox Page 18

  As usual, she was right. It was time to stand on my own two feet. After spending so long mooning after people that were better leaders than me, or that made better life choices than me, I doubted my own capabilities. But I could do this. I’d proved I could. Looking back on my challenges, I was proud of the way I’d stepped up and guided my team to victory. I didn’t need another Prime to make sure I stayed on track. Did I?

  ***

  Enough light bled from the streetlights beyond the wall for me to make out the swirling gravel patterns. I kept to the grass, toeing the line between respecting the dead and remaining inconspicuous. The thump of my pulse in my ears set me scanning the area for prying eyes. Sure, I’d scaled the locked gates, but I wasn’t creeped out or worried about being caught, just desperate to be alone.

  As I continued, the gravestones became less worn and chipped. The names and dates were crisper, easier to read in the orange tinge of light pollution. I didn’t find what I was searching for on the new, half empty row - guess people died more often than I realised.

  Callum’s grave wasn’t as showy as I imagined. No bigger than the flood of memorials surrounding him. It’s what he’d want. The miniscule amount of years between his birth and death date compared to his neighbours drove me to my knees. I crawled the last step towards his headstone and rested my brow against the side, curled into myself like a hunted hedgehog.

  “I miss you,” I whispered. “And… and I guess I’m sorry and angry and confused and I don’t know whether to blame you or me because both hurt way too much. Everything’s a mess and what did you expect? You know I can’t be trusted to make a decision for myself. We were supposed to do this together, you know? Then the first time we were apart, this happened. I should have been there.”

  I ran my fingertips over the lettering, tracing Callum’s name. Callum Marshall Capshaw. He hated his middle name. Some amalgamation of a sob and a giggle slipped past my lips as I remembered the way he frowned at me whenever I used it. Special occasions only when I really wanted to irritate him.

  “Oh, damn. I miss you so freaking much. You jackass. If you weren’t dead, I’d punch you right now. How can you be dead? Look, see? I did it. Fully licenced and you never even saw me pass or got to do that yourself. You’d have made it look easy - I know you would. And probably charmed bloody Beaux into giving you points and got there first. I wouldn’t have minded coming second if I got to have you there with me. I wouldn’t…”

  Out of words, I tapped a capsule in my wristlet.

  Charlotte turned a few times, snuffling in the darkness until she understood where I’d brought her. I doubt she knew how to read but it was pretty obvious why I’d summoned her. The draco pressed her snout to the stone with her eyes squeezed shut and she contracted her fore claws until they scraped faint lines in the recent grass growth.

  I left her to her grief for a few moments, letting her work things out in her own way. When she turned her face to me with shimmering eyes, I patted my lap. She was too heavy really, but we cuddled up comfortable enough that I could stroke her smouldering scales while telling her stories about our college years.

  Coming here didn’t take my pain away. Don’t know why I thought it would. If anything, I’d ripped open the injured bit inside starting to heal. I wanted to stay there and tell Callum everything, like maybe I’d be able to feel his opinion or encouragement if I was close enough to his resting place. But that was it, he was here to rest. His time guiding me was over. Charlotte was here though, her and my other Gems. Mum was right, if I was going to move forward it would be down to me and my team. I’d make sure I became a Prime Callum would be proud to call a friend.

  I stopped at home for a few weeks, ignoring the daily calls and messages I left unread from Eli until they petered out altogether. My focus was on training, even that jerk had to approve. I tried to involve Zoe as much as possible too. Not to strengthen her Gem, but to share the lessons I’d had to learn on my own so she could get a leg up. I wanted my little sister to have a good life alongside her career.

  My team grew closer, to me and each other. We spent hours drilling and going over tactics. The attempts to process my thoughts left me hollowed out and broken, still reeling from what Mrs Capshaw had shared with me. But when the time came, and I felt ready to leave, I would go out knowing I hadn’t wasted a single moment.

  It took a while, yeah, I struggle to describe that period. I guess depression hit me, made worse because passing the challenges should be a massive celebration. I kept wondering about the other Primes that were travelling around and capping their challenge points. There was no way any of them had a more horrendous time than I did.

  It lifted though. As I saw my Gems try so hard to improve, it gave me a release. Their efforts shouldn’t be in vain. No, I wanted to show off their progress. I was ready to step out and climb the leagues.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  As I walked into town, I decided I’d made the right choice. The thrill of a new environment, the possibilities and potential running through my mind. My wristlet wrapped tight against my skin, calling to me to unleash my Gems and put them through their paces.

  Should I have told Mrs Capshaw about me leaving home? Possibly. She’d asked me to keep her updated. But I was sick to death of babysitters and following other people’s agendas. The things she’d shared with me were awful and I never wanted a group like Alfie’s Saviours to have control over our way of life. But I couldn’t live like that forever. I’d always be wondering who talked to me because someone had paid them instead of because they chose to. The only answer was to stay on the down low. I mean, was she even right about them targeting me? The group I’d bumped into hadn’t looked twice at me.

  I found a haven in Orchester. I’d already checked it out a while back, a nice little backwater that Primes enjoyed visiting for a retreat to train their Gems. It didn’t have contests itself, or pressure to battle each other to prove yourself. Like a little truce in the middle of a competitive world. I needed that right now.

  I wandered down the main street into a market square. I retied my hair, lifting it away from my neck to combat the impending prickle of sweat as I squinted at the blazing noon sun. There wasn’t the hefty bustle I’d expected here, just tight-knit friendship groups or solo Primes traipsing between the tiny shops and cafes. An average place with average people.

  A welcome delicate breeze blew a waft of fresh baked bread across my face, something about that smell soothes your soul.

  I saw him first. Accidentally caught his eye, but that didn’t stop me from turning tail and walking the opposite direction. No way was it a coincidence. Either Eli had followed me, or I was going crazy enough to hallucinate.

  My trousers swished with every violent stomp I took away from the town centre. Ricochets of my boot heels clomped the flagstones. My fingertips strayed to the capsules nestled at my wrist.

  With a crackle, Zeke appeared in front of me. His alien eyes stared up into mine as little sparkles of electricity dissipated from his speed boost.

  “It’s not you,” I said, wagging my finger at the mantis, “It’s your douchebag of a Prime.”

  I sidestepped the Gem and strode on, but he’d impeded me long enough.

  “Sam!” I froze at his voice. Stupid, I should have kept walking. “Please, talk to me.”

  I clenched my fists, hit Finn’s capsule, so he materialised at my side. I didn’t expect to fight Eli, or to win if I tried, but I laid my twitching fingers on the blazing fur of Finn’s ruff to ground myself. This was about me and my Gems, and the future best for us.

  “Why? I heard everything I need to about you already. Funny though, because none of it came from you.”

  “Don’t I get to tell you myself? Because you don’t know everything, far from it. Even the bits you think you do; you don’t know why I did them. I didn’t need to get close to you to do my job, Sam. I could have been invisible the entire time.”

  “You mean like how you’re foll
owing me again? Don’t you have some other girl you’re being paid to stalk yet?” Heads turned. A few people whispered between themselves and gave us a wide berth.

  “Let’s sit down and talk about this, okay? Listen to my side of this and whatever you want to do afterwards is up to you. For the record, yeah, I wanted to see you. But you told me you were coming here after you’d been home for a while, and you said Orchester’s a good place to train.” Lines wrinkled his forehead, a little frown of emphasis as he spoke. I didn’t want to see him because I was too desperate to be wrong about him. But he’d lied to me. How was I supposed to go forward with even a friendship when I could never be sure he was being transparent?

  “You’ve got ten minutes. If you get me a drink.” Why did I have to be so damn soft?

  He chose a cafe, a sweet, old-fashioned place a few streets away. Finn padded after me, I didn’t plan to recall him. Zeke tailed us unseen, the little bloody ninja. We didn’t speak on the way, Eli’s gaze drifted, his mouth turned down at the corners. He shoved his hands deep in his pockets. I’d never seen him so flustered. Was he that bothered about what I thought of him?

  We got seated in a corner, away from prying eyes and ears, and Eli headed to the counter to fetch some drinks. I wanted to scratch Finn’s ruff, but a waitress nodded towards our Gems and made us recall them from the narrow aisles. Why was I being such an idiot? This guy had played me big time. And yeah, I’d enjoyed flirting with him and… other stuff. But I didn’t want to be back in this state again soon. Another part of me wanted to convince myself that the past few weeks were just a mix up, and I hadn’t been dumb enough to let him use me.

  “Cream and sprinkles,” Eli said, putting a tall cup of hot chocolate in front of me and settling down over his rocket fuel black coffee.

  “Thanks,” I muttered, scooping off part of the creamy mountain, “Time starts now.”

  “I was stupid. I thought I could get away with not telling you why I’d been close by when you first pulled that SOS tab. You’re so independent and I didn’t want you to get mad about me bodyguarding you. In case you wondered, everything apart from hiding that was real. I didn’t put on an act to make you like me and I didn’t get closer to you because it would make my job easier. It would have been way simpler to leave one of my Gems to shadow you. But I enjoyed being around you and always being alone because you’re following someone else’s route sucks.”

  “So, why did you take the job? If you hate being a creepy stalker so much, why aren’t you really a heroic lifesaver that goes off to rescue people and take down big threats?”

  “I told you, I do that sometimes. But a few years ago, I got into trouble, and I didn’t fully understand the consequences. I fell into a terrible situation, but Mrs Capshaw saw I had potential. She said that if I work for her and do the odd job now and again to pay her back, she’d make it all disappear. It’s never anything immoral or illegal, and until now it’s not been a problem. I wanted to tell you, but she wouldn’t let me. And that lady is not someone you mess with.”

  “You aren’t doing a good job of confirming my theory you’re an awful person who wanted to get a bonus with his pay cheque,” I grumbled, sipping at my drink.

  “Sam,” Eli’s eyes widened at my accusation and he leaned across to take my hand, “Do you think I’d try this hard to get in touch with you if I’d already got everything I wanted?”

  “I don’t even know what to think about you, the few bits I thought I figured out about you are totally wrong. I feel like an idiot for trusting you and I don’t want to feel like that again, would I be stupid to give you another chance? Is your boss likely to walk in on us again and tell me what a poor, pathetic little inconvenience I am?” I snatched my hand away, folded my arms, and stared out the window, desperate not to let him see anything other than irritation on my features.

  “It’s obvious she cares about you, Sam. And I do too. I wish… I wish I could protect you from people trying to protect you. She’s so determined to make sure you’re okay, I mean, I heard what happened to her kid, so I guess she’s having some kind of meltdown. There’s no way I can promise she won’t still have people watching out for you, I can’t even promise she won’t ask me again. I don’t want that to stop us at least hanging out, maybe getting to where you trust me to have the best intentions towards you.”

  My head floated with trying to figure him out. He sounded apologetic, and as though he meant what he said. But I’d never questioned any of the lies he’d told before either. Fuzz spread across my tongue from the heat of the drink and the rich sweetness of the cocoa.

  “I need some time on my own, I’ve been travelling all day and I just want some water and a lie down right now,” I said, standing while fighting a tremor in my thighs. This conversation overwhelmed me too much right now. No way I’d make any kind of decision I wouldn’t regret somehow.

  “I’ll walk you back to the lodge.” Eli took my arm and let me lean on him as we exited the little hut.

  My limbs dragged with every step and I almost drifted to sleep on his shoulder as we walked away from the cafe and along the road. My feet trailed like dead weights that threatened to trip me up and soon enough Eli leant us against a wall. It was dark here, quiet. It hadn’t registered in my porridge-goop mind he’d been leading me away from the rest of the townsfolk. That the prick had drugged my drink.

  “Please don’t hate me,” his voice was thick with begging. “She told you to tell her where you were going. If you’d just said something, took someone with you…”

  My vision swam like a water type Gem had filled my eyes with liquid, the entire world tipped and swayed. With the dregs of my energy, I clung onto Eli’s chest and he hugged me close with his cheek pressed to my temple as he summoned Kira.

  “I wish I could tell you everything, Sam. If it was only you, me, and our teams… But I don’t… I can’t see a way out. Not for me anyway.”

  I guess I should have trusted my instincts about him. As I faded away into unconsciousness, I wasn’t curious about his words. I was furious I’d given him the time of day. I should have known he’d be up to something. Part of me knew. Because when I woke up in a building I’d never been in, with my eBand and Gems taken, it didn’t even surprise me. I was only disappointed with myself.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  My eyelids twitched, fluttered, let in streaky light. A wash of ochre haze covered the small amount of floor I could see without moving my cricked neck. Air chilled my bare wrists for the first time I could remember.

  No Gems, no SOS tab. Just my body and my wits.

  Oh crap, I was screwed.

  “Get up,” an impatient man’s voice said. Not Eli. This command came from someone older and unfamiliar.

  I considered ignoring him, pretending I was still out to get an advantage on the situation.

  “Sam, please.” Eli. My eyes snapped open, and I half-hoisted my drugged body upright, intent on teaching that skinny little liar a lesson. My muscles weren’t in on the plan, they gave up as soon as I put weight on them.

  “Samantha Wentworth…”

  “Sam,” I said over the new guy. “Though he could have told you that.”

  “You need to remain calm, Miss Wentworth.” The dude sure seemed calm himself. He stood with an immaculate posture, dressed in tough combat trousers with a cream-coloured shirt tucked into them. He had capsule holsters similar to Eli’s bound around his thighs.

  “Oh yeah, can’t believe I’d even be the slightest bit agitated. I mean getting knocked unconscious, dragged off, robbed, and sneered at is just a part of everyday life, huh, mister?”

  “You understand you’re here to keep you safe, don’t you? I thought she knew what was going on?” A bushy moustache twitched under the guy’s broad nose as he glared down at Eli stood next to him.

  “I don’t even know what’s going on. It’s not my job to know.” His voice tightened to breaking point, and I swear the other guy’s lips tweaked into a smirk at Eli�
��s admission.

  “The boss didn’t want her upset or confused, Elias. Every complaint this young lady has will come down on your shoulders…”

  “Heads-up, I have a few,” I said as I forced my body into a seating position against the chill of the wall. Either it was the middle of the night or we were underground. Or this crazy dude liked to use the air con too liberally.

  “What’s new,” Eli muttered to himself, flicking a disgusted glance at his partner.

  “I don’t care what you guys know or are trying to do. I want my team back, I want my gear, and I want to leave.” I didn’t do too bad with putting authority into my words for someone that looked like a thawing snowman right now.

  “That won’t be happening. At least for the present. Mrs Capshaw will want to speak with you first, don’t worry, she’s on her way. We’ll take the best care of you though, Sam. We need to make sure you will not be a liability, you understand that?” He had that irritating, perfectly rational way of being a condescending asshole that made me ache to punch him. My temper was becoming a problem. Or I met people that deserved a punch on a more frequent basis nowadays.

  “I want my Gems. Or I’ll kick off big time. Then you’ll both get your asses kicked when Mina comes to see me.” I never used her first name, never ever. That woman demanded respect by her mere presence. And it paid off. Hesitation froze the guy’s face before he formed a word, and Eli’s frenzied tugging at his hoodie string turned from distracted playing to a full-on nervous tick.